Marketing Deal Announced

The following article first appeared on Episcopal Cafe's The Lead. While we're generally grumpy about the fact that this "cafe" still hasn't delivered our double espressos, we're impressed with their nose for news. They scooped every other media outlet to get this story, including the SEC. Tim and Scott did want to squash one rumor, however: they will not be changing the name to Lent McMadness.

Innovative Marketing Deal Announced

mcdonalds-sign-horizForward Movement has entered into an agreement with international fast-food giant McDonald's to issue special Lenten Happy Meals featuring popular saints in what will be called “Holy Heroes Happy Meal.”

Starting this Holy Week, you can get an action figure of saints voted on by fans of Lent Madness, an annual project of Forward Movement of Cincinnati, Ohio.

“We feel this imaginative product spin-off will benefit both parties in countless ways,” said Scott Gunn, Executive Director of Forward Movement.

“Every Lent many thousands of Christians take to the brackets and vote their favorite saints until one and only one wins the Golden Halo,” says Jeff Stratton, President of McDonald's USA. “We can’t imagine anything more inspiring than a Julia Chester Emery or Samuel Isaac Joseph Schereshewsky action figure in a child’s Happy Meal.”

"We got the idea to partner with McDonald's by thinking about St. Lawrence who was roasted to death," said the Rev. Tim Schenck, who first came up with the idea for Lent Madness. "After he was in the fire for a while, he called out 'I'm done on the side, turn me over.' We appreciate a guy who kept his sense of humor to the last. And McDonald's does too."

It is understood that this promotion will appeal to more than just children.

“We expect that many adults will snap these up as collector’s items,” said Gunn. “Many bookshelves in many clergy offices will no doubt be enhanced Printby their mere presence. Seminary texts that haven’t be touched for years will certainly be spiffed up by these characters!”

Celebrity bloggers will create the fun and informative texts that will accompany each meal printed on every box.

Predicting which saints to produce will be tricky. For example, Shereshewsky was voted out in early voting in this year’s brackets but after the production run was ordered. It was confirmed that past Golden Halo winners Frances Perkins and Mary Magdalene will be available. “While these figures won’t substitute for Lent Madness itself, we foresee a new level of saintly silliness as this partnership proceeds.”

With the corporate sponsorship, the only required change was to give the winner "Golden Arches" rather than the traditional Golden Halo. Gunn and Schenck agreed the change was worth it: "We've super-sized this one!"

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60 comments on “Marketing Deal Announced”

  1. This was actually pretty tasteless, even for you guys, and for awhile really frightening. Happy Fool's Day to you, you win.

  2. And the Golden Arches are at the entrance to Heaven. April Fool - they are at the entrance to Hell.

  3. Great ideA for April 1. Just think of the wringing of hands and necks that would occur if it were true!

  4. Lent Madness is such hot stuff maybe next year you can partner with Gold's Horseradish and have an action figure in every jar!

  5. If I can't really order a Blessed Saintly Happy Meal I've very happy to have been introduced to Moxy Fruvous.

  6. You all are crazy. I never thought of St. Lawrence in the same synaptic firing as McDonald's. It makes sense. I think you have found the patron Saint of fast food and grilling out.
    I am prouder than ever that my surname is an Anglicized derivation of a Gaelic derivation of Lawrence/Laurence. We were the people who lived by St. Lawrence Church. Doubtless we were in charge of parish picnics and bar-b-ques, which in my part of the south is a description for pork, beef or chicken, slow cooked over a hard wood fire and anointed with a savory sauce, not a verb for grilling out. For my California cousins, however... oh well.
    McDonald's Go Bragh.
    Donald of the O'Loughery+

  7. Absolutely great!!! Thanks for the best laugh on April Fools day in many years. You guys are the best.

  8. You mean it was a joke? I can't get a McScheresCHEWsky burger with fries to go? Rats!

    1. An April Fools joke? I wanted a McMaryMagdalene Strawberry Milk Shake to go with my McScheresCHEWsky burger and fries. I am crushed. I am with you aleathia!