A Solemn Proclamation from the Supreme Executive Committee of Lent Madness

Be it known to all unto whom these present letters may come, that the Episcopal Church is preparing to gather in its General Convention, said Convention to be held in the city and diocese of Indianapolis in the Hoosier state; and

Whereas, It would be madness if no one lent the Convention a bit of holy humor and saintly piety; and

Whereas, The Supreme Executive Committee has taken unto itself to improve and saintify the General Convention; now therefore be it

Resolved, That Friday, July 6, 2012 is hereby declared as Lent Madness Day; and be it further

Resolved, That Mary Magdalene, or a life-size cardboard image thereof, shall be present for those who wish to have their photographs taken or portraits painted with the winner of the Golden Halo in Lent Madness 2012; and be it further

Resolved, That the bracket for Lent Madness 2013 shall be revealed to all persons throughout the world on Lent Madness Day; and be it further

Resolved, That the first play-in match shall be held on this day, allowing General Convention guests, bishops, and deputies the opportunity to cast the most important vote of the entire Convention; and be it further

Resolved, That the entire Supreme Executive Committee shall be present at the Forward Movement booth of the exhibit hall to offer autographs of the aforementioned Supreme Executive Committee.

Given under our hand, seal, and smirk on this day, the twenty-second day of June in the two thousand and twelfth year of our Lord's grace, being the Feast of St. Alban, who has never done well in Lent Madness.

After an Easter hiatus, Tim and Scott are back to reveal how the Supreme Executive Committee discerns the bracket for Lent Madness. For a limited time, your nominations are welcomed for the bracket of Lent Madness 2013.

Enjoy more videos on the Lent Madness video channel.

Many Lent Madness fans have beseeched the Supreme Executive Committee for ways to survive the long duration until Lent Madness 2013. By the way, Lent Madness 2013 begins on February 14, 2013, and you can check the countdown clock any time on www.lentmadness.org. Anyway, in their mercy, the SEC has compiled a list of suggestions for those of you wondering how you'll last until next year's Ash Thursday.

We're also starting a support group called Lenten Seasonal Affective Disorder, or LSAD. Never before have so many lamented the end of Lent. We've heard reports that in at least one parish, a distraught Lent Madness participant tackled the Celebrant at the Easter Vigil just before she proclaimed the Easter Acclamation. And the managers of several fine hotels along Waikiki Beach have complained about finding several defaced copies of the requisite Gideon's Bibles. It seems that several guests have crossed out verses referring to "40 days and 40 nights" and have inserted the word "endless."

Top Ten Ways to Combat Long-Term LMW

Finally, if you have suggestions for the bracket of Lent Madness 2013, contact the Supreme Executive Committee soon. They will be meeting in an undisclosed location to begin deliberations. Make sure you review this year's bracket, as well as the brackets for Lent Madness 2010 and Lent Madness 2011. The only saints who make repeat appearances are those who did not make it past the first round. Unless the SEC grants a special dispensation.

Those of you who have been following along will know that the Supreme Executive Committee has been promoting Spy Wednesday as the day for the final battle for the Golden Halo. Several of you have asked us about the name Spy Wednesday. Ever happy to educate and inspire, we are only too happy to oblige.

Spy Wednesday gets its name because this is the day on which Judas betrayed Jesus to the Sanhedrin. Because Judas is thought to be sneaky, his actions conjured up the image of a spy. This is how the Gospel of Luke recounts the events of today:

Then Satan entered into Judas called Iscariot, who was one of the twelve; he went away and conferred with the chief priests and officers of the temple police about how he might betray him to them. They were greatly pleased and agreed to give him money. So he consented and began to look for an opportunity to betray him to them when no crowd was present. (Luke 22:3-6)

The illustration here evocatively depicts this infamous scene. If you go to Holy Eucharist every day of Holy Week, the Gospel readings provide the narrative of Jesus' final days, an ever-quickening story that spins out of control and finally brings us to Good Friday.

It is surely a strange juxtaposition to think about Spy Wednesday and Lent Madness in the same moment. But the whole point of Lent Madness is to engage us all in an exploration of the ways God's grace has filled the lives of women and men through history and across all cultures. Sure, we've been silly and even competitive about our Lenten exercise. In the end though, we are learning to see in fresh ways how Jesus Christ matters to all humanity. That seems like a good and holy thing to do on Spy Wednesday.

Now, get thee to the polls and vote! Only one saint will emerge standing today, wearing the coveted Golden Halo. Will it be Emma of Hawaii or Mary Magdalene? You decide.

This week Tim and Scott look ahead to the championship match of Lent Madness. They also contemplate a factfinding trip to a faraway destination and, as if that wasn't enough, they display the world premiere of what could become an Olympic event: Synchronized Blessing.

Monday Madness -- April 2, 2012 from Forward Movement on Vimeo.

Enjoy more videos on the Lent Madness video channel.

This is a guest post by the Rev. Josh Hale, pastor of Perritte Memorial United Methodist Church in Nacogdoches, Texas. You might know Josh from Twitter, where he is @expatminister.

With the Elate Eight narrowed down now to the Faithful Four, let’s pause a moment and reflect on all of the kitsch which helped catapult (or hobble) these saints toward the Golden Halo. Clearly we can see that tacky souvenirs are not just a modern, capitalist byproduct of religion, but something which has been around for centuries—even millennia!

So just how did we come by these knickknacks...and evaluate them as "tawdry"?

I'm glad you asked.

My first year of ministry was spent amongst the Methodists of rural northeastern England, and they had established vibrant and enriching ecumenical partnerships with the Anglicans in their area. One of my colleagues' villages was West Halton (North Lincolnshire) and its parish church dedicated to Saint Etheldreda, of whom I had never heard before.

St. Etheldreda holding a church, possibly a souvenir model with a tempting sale price.

Now Etheldreda (or Æthelthryth) was an East Anglian princess. As a Christian young lady, she took a vow of perpetual virginity, which caused a fair bit of strain as she kept getting married off to build political alliances. As I heard the story, Etheldreda was married to Egfrid, the King of Northumbria at the height of its power. He wanted children, she clearly did not…so she hoofed it. She made it across the boundary of the Humber River to freedom, and the spot where she prayed in celebration is where the West Halton parish church is now located.

Great, you’re saying, but what does this have to do with those St. Margaret tote bags from last week? We’re getting there! After our friend Etheldreda celebrates her escape with two female companions, she goes further south to Ely (which was a gift from her first husband) and founded an abbey there, which later becomes the diocesan cathedral. She finally dies in 679 after a life of exemplary piety and impressive administrative gifts.

But here’s what you need to know--another, more common, form of her name was Audrey. Pilgrims visiting her remains in Cambridgeshire, and later those who patronized the fair held in her name in Ely, often purchased local goods to remember her by, especially lacy clothing. These came over time to be considered low-quality or outdated goods, and among 17th century Puritans (who disdained frills and lace) they began to be sneered at by a corruption of her name: tawdry.

So the next time you’re visiting the megachurch coffee shop or a cathedral bookstore, think about St. Etheldreda’s life of faith...and how she too is likely facepalming at the tawdry stuff Christians are willing to buy.

To follow up on the earlier post from today, here are excerpts from devotional sketches for the two saints who are duking it out on Tuesday, Emma of Hawaii and Dietrich Bonhoeffer. These are excerpts from Calendar of Saints: Lent Madness 2012 Edition, published by Forward Movement.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer

As the Nazi ring closed in upon him and the Confessing Church he had an opportunity for asylum in the United States, which he declined. He was arrested and jailed in 1943, and from his cell in Berlin he helped plan an assassination of Adolf Hitler. The assassination failed and Bonhoeffer’s involvement was discovered, and he was sent to Buchenwald concentration camp. But his life was spared, for reasons we do not know, and he was transferred to Schoenberg Prison. There he served as chaplain to fellow inmates until on a Sunday in 1945, immediately following divine services, he was summoned by the guards and taken by automobile to Flossenburg Prison, where he was summarily hanged. That was on April 9. Bonhoeffer was thirty-nine years old. The crumbling German Reich formally surrendered twenty-eight days later.

May we, like Dietrich Bonhoeffer, count the cost of discipleship to be worthy of our whole selves. Amen.

Emma of Hawaii

The Hawaiian Islands were first evangelized by sternly Calvinistic Congregationalists and by Roman Catholics. Neither group had much respect for the other or for the native Hawaiian culture and traditions. King Kamehameha IV, who was crowned in 1854, and his wife, Queen Emma, actively sought a branch of Christianity that was all-embracing, reconciliatory, and accepting of Hawaiian culture, yet orthodox and traditional. They found such in Anglicanism. Queen Victoria served as godmother to their son. Under royal patronage Thomas N. Staley became Hawaii’s first bishop, ground was broken for St. Andrew’s Cathedral in Honolulu, The Book of Common Prayer was translated into Hawaiian, the Queen’s Hospital was founded, and several schools were established in the islands with Anglican clergy as tutors. Kamehameha was only twenty-nine when he died. Queen Emma lived on for many years and became a symbol of dignity and Christian piety to the people of Hawaii. The Archbishop of Canterbury described her as one of the most saintly souls he had ever met.

We thank you for the witness of Kamehameha and Emma and for their work to build up your church. Amen.

By the way, for only seven bucks you can get your own copy of Calendar of Saints: Lent Madness 2012 Edition. It’s available as an ebook only for Kindle and Nook.

Today being Palm Sunday, the Supreme Executive Committee is focused on palms, processions, readings of the passion of Jesus, and so on. However, we also can't escape the fact that tomorrow begins the showdown in the Faithful Four. Bright and early tomorrow morning, both Mary Magdalene and Margaret of Scotland will compete. Only one will emerge, ready to enter the championship match on Wednesday.

After lots of kitsch last week -- and a little bit of, um, kontroversy -- we thought we'd encourage a more reverent contemplation today. As many of you know, Forward Movement (the sponsor of Lent Madness 2012) publishes a book called Calendar of the Saints: Lent Madness 2012 Edition. It's a set of devotional essays for every saint in the official calendar of the Episcopal Church, plus the saints who made it into the bracket of Lent Madness this year but who aren't yet officially commemorated. There are plenty of places to get facts and narrative hagiographies. These brief essays are intended for private devotional use, and they tend to focus on one aspect of the saint's life which can be applied to our own. Each entry concludes with a prayer.

Here are excerpts from the two essays for Margaret of Scotland and Mary Magdalene. Later today we'll post the entries for Tuesday's contentants, Emma of Hawaii and Dietrich Bonhoeffer.

Margaret of Scotland

Mary Magdalene

By the way, for only seven bucks you can get your own copy of Calendar of Saints: Lent Madness 2012 Edition. It's available as an ebook only for Kindle and Nook.

To help you through this weekend's likely bout of Lent Madness Withdrawal, the Supreme Executive Committee wishes to offer menu suggestions for Palm Sunday. We hope this will also aid in your discernment as to which of the Faithful Four you will seek to propel into the championship battle on Spy Wednesday.

Monday morning, Margaret of Scotland will face Mary Magdalene beginning at 8 a.m. Eastern time. One of two queens in the Faithful Four, Margaret will face the "Apostle to the Apostles."

Flickr user Meri Tosh gives us this picture of the classic Scottish food, haggis. Of course, whether it is food is debatable, but that's not our purpose here. Because the SEC seeks to be inclusive, we note (with some wariness) that there is something called "vegetarian haggis" too.

Finding food to represent Mary Magdalene was tricky. The one time in scripture we know she showed up for dinner, she brought ointment in an alabaster jar (or so Pope Gregory the Great said, referring to Luke 7:37). That seemed like a lousy choice for an illustration, so we combed through tradition. She is said to have confronted the Emperor Tiberius to tell him of Christ's resurrection whilst holding an egg. The emperor laughed and said that Christ's resurrection was as likely as that plain white egg turning red. Well, guess what happened? So here we portray Mary's red eggs (thanks to Flickr user jessmonster).

On Tuesday morning, Emma of Hawaii is up against Dietrich Bonhoeffer. The action begins promptly at 8 a.m. Eastern time.

People will argue about the quintessential German food. Here we shall go with the classic pretzel as portrayed by Flickr user avlxyz.

Finally, a photo which shows the ubiquity of Hawaiian influence on pan-Asian cuisine. A few years ago, I snapped this photo in Tokyo. Yes, that's a Hawaiian food truck. In Tokyo.

So there you have it. Tomorrow after church, have a meal with eggs, haggis, pretzels, and perhaps some fruit. As you say grace, ask God to inspire you through dining.

Be known to us, Lent Madness, in the breaking of the pretzel, the cracking of the eggs, the slicing of the haggis, and the peeling of the pineapple.

This week, Tim and Scott preview upcoming battles in the Elate Eight and more. Hilarity ensues.

On a related note, if you want the very best wall-to-wall, up-to-the-minute, action-packed, lemon-fresh coverage of the Lent Madness action, follow us on Twitter (@LentMadness).

Enjoy more videos on the Lent Madness video channel.