"Grace and peace to you from God our Father, and the Lord Jesus Christ,” as Paul of Tarsus said before he was ignominiously defeated by Emma of Hawaii in Lent Madness 2012.
As you know from breathlessly following Lent Madness on Facebook and Twitter (using hashtag #SECconclave), the Supreme Executive Committee has been prayerfully discerning the 2016 bracket throughout the day. Much coffee was consumed. And then more coffee was consumed.
We realize that many of you find it unbearable to endure the wait until All Brackets’ Day (November 3), when the 2016 bracket is released to the entire world. The SEC hears the plaintive cry of the Lent Madness faithful, and we assure you of our constant concern during this wilderness time. Though not so much as to provide even a hint about the content of the aforementioned 2016 bracket.
Of course, to keep things in perspective, it could always be worse. You could contract leprosy -- although that wouldn’t be so bad either, since you would be able to meet Damien of Molokai (defeated in the first round of Lent Madness 2013) while experiencing an all-expenses-paid (not by us) trip to Hawaii.
Nonetheless, the SEC, in our beneficent magnanimity and unsurpassed compassion hereby offer the follow coping strategies:
Remember, we are with you in spirit as you ponder in your heart (like Mary, who will never be in Lent Madness) the official start of Lent Madness 2016 on Ash Thursday, February 11, 2016.
Sent this day by our respective hands and sealed by digital wax,
Tim & Scott
Please Note: This Pastoral Letter is to be read from every pulpit in all of Christendom this coming Sunday. If necessary, go ahead and step into the pulpit just after the sermon. Your clergy will thank you. And make sure you read this with feeling, not in a monotone as if Jesus' saints bore you.